When Olivia died, I sunk into a very dark place I never thought I'd escape. The last two years have been a roller coaster of emotions and events, and somehow I'm still standing strong. I'm still not sure how.
I reconnected with a work friend last week I hadn't seen in over a year, and learned that she lost he 14 year old son last year to cancer. I offered my condolences and a hug, and before my eyes I saw her very fresh wound tear open. Her pain is so raw that it made my heart ache for her. I know how much it hurts to lose a child you never met, I can't imagine the ache of losing someone who was part of your life for so long.
We shared our stories (she never knew exactly what happened to me), shed some tears, and parted knowing there's one more person out there who "gets it".
I feel like my community of moms who have lost children continues to expand. I wish the opposite would happen, no one deserves to go through this.
I am so sorry. I always say something/comment when I read about loss because my mom (a labor & delivery nurse) once told me that even when you feel there are not the right words, staying silent is worse. From my reading about grief I don't think it ever hurts less, time just buoys one forward. And like you said, we hope no one else goes through this but at the same time knowing we're not alone might help. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteHi Sheri. I found your blog after clicking around other baby loss blogs. I wanted to thank you for posting your story, congratulate you on you beautiful little boy and thank you for posting the nurses grieving video. I lost my first child to Trisomy 18 in January. We chose to terminate rather than allow my child to suffer and die. It breaks my heart every. single. day. We are trying to conceive again, and I'll be following you in the hopes that soon I too will be parenting after loss. Again Thank you, Liz
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean. I wish this community would stop expanding. It is just so unfair...so many broken hearts.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing your journey Sheri. There is strength in numbers. Our hearts never forget the pain of losing a child, and only those who have walked the path can ever truly understand. I cannot imagine the pain your friend lives with, I am sure she was grateful to have someone to talk to who could at least relate, and give her a shoulder to cry on.
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